hat does it take to fit in?

Wonderful morals? A great personality? Being trustworthy? How about responsibility? Maybe a great leader? Always having manners? Someone who is smart? A person who can hold an actual conversation?

I tried to stay away from writing a column about my brother. He's a freshman here; however, I recently had an incident which has made me question society.

Sunday, my brother called to tell me he had been cut from the fraternity he pledged into more than five months ago. Yes, I said five months.

This is not a money issue or a wasted time issue.

I have been a student at Tech for nearly four years, and I've also watched guys come and go in different fraternities. So, this got me thinking. Is this happening everywhere?

How can society say a person is exactly what they are looking for, befriend that person, then several months later, tell them they do not want them to belong to their group?

Does this really make sense? What are we teaching ourselves?

I'm not trying to down the Greek system by any means; I belong to it and strongly support it.

I just want to understand.

As a member of a sorority, we pledge members, and then a couple of months later they become active members.

Of course, they have to keep high moral standards and stay on the right track with their grades, but there is no way we would release someone because they were not around every waking moment. We are talking five months of waiting here.

First of all, why would you ask someone to join an organization if you thought they did not meet the qualifications? I don't know, maybe someone can enlighten me.

I understand the pledging process is a time to get to know people, and I also understand many organizations would not be what they are if just anyone could be a member. But five months?

A lot of the guys in this organization are my friends.

I'm not angry; I guess I am just disappointed in them. Maybe I'm disappointed in myself, as well.

Besides, wasn't I the one who had been telling my brother for the past three years he needed to come to Tech and join a fraternity?

Well, these men are supposed to be my brother's friends -- everyone and everything he knows at Tech.

Granted, not every man in this organization, or any organization for that matter, is to blame. I know some really great guys.

I guess another example is how we encourage people to try out for a certain organization, like cheerleading or an athletic team. But then when we feel they aren't good enough, we don't want them to be a part of our group anymore.

My brother says he doesn't care about being cut, but who wouldn't? I think it's just a front.

Since he has been at Tech, that fraternity and those men are what he knows of the "college life."

So what exactly is society saying?

We like you, but we don't?

I guess it is just hard for me to look within the fraternity and see how some guys are there and my brother isn't (but maybe that's just me being biased). Like I said, not every man is to blame because some of them really are magnificent individuals. But is the whole system to blame?

Just give me some time -- I'm a little bitter.

And, the amazing thing is my brother told me he still wanted to hang out with some of those men. "They are my friends," he said.

Well, guys, looks like you just lost out on a really great person.

If that doesn't say "loyalty," I don't know what does.

And this is not really about my brother. I'm questioning the very society to which I belong.

Jennifer Reynolds is a senior journalism major from Shreveport and serves as editor for The Tech Talk. E-mail comments to jmr035@latech.edu.