Tech has a beautiful campus. The buildings and foliage blend to form an aesthetically pleasing view. Green grass, fresh flowers, timeless trees and the -- taking off from the green space in front of the Graham Residence Hall.

Why? To protect us from Russians, of course. If it takes out Sonic on its path to victory, that's a small matter.

Continuing across campus, through the Quad, to the Lady of the Mist. She sits in her (sometimes) functional fountain keeping faithful watch over the library. She is good at what she does because of her splendidly long neck. I feel sorry for her, poor thing.

More than once, especially during the winter quarters, I have this barely repressible urge to give the Lady a sweater. I can practically see her shivering under that gauzy frock. She's cold and everyone knows it. Her nipples show.

Walk past the bookstore, the newly opened Tolliver Hall and freshly renovated Ropp Center, then stand on the hill beside Tech's nearly Olympic-sized, T-shaped pool. Tech's western side is lined with a cluster of residence halls, and standing sentinel over them isÉ

A rocket. So we can remember we beat the Russians to space (sort of).

Besides the artillery, Tech has many wonderful things to offer in state-of-the-art facilities. Tech is dedicated to preserving its history, too, as evidenced by renovations and rebuildings of its, well, buildings. Then there are the curiosities: the rocket, the plane and the nipples.

The airplane almost makes sense, because Tech has an aviation program. But it is in Davison Hall, and not in Graham. Girls, not airplanes, live in Graham.

Even the lovely Lady's elongated neck has an explanation: it seems she loses her head, from time to time to pranksters.

Russia explains everything else.

My dad, a Tech graduate, was distraught a few years ago when I told him of the deconstruction and reconstruction of Hale Hall.

"You mean the building with the turrets one top?" he asked, because he just could not remember the name of the building unused and condemned in his day.

"They can't tear that building down! What are they going to do if the Russians invade from I-20?"

I do not think that is the real issue, anymore.

We live in a world of terrorism, now. No more Cold Wars to worry about. In our society, we would much rather blow each other up than just sit on our different continents and call names and threaten with big guns.

Aggressive, not passive, that's the way to do things.

No, don't go thinking that I'm a warmonger, or that I want to get rid of these monuments that have stood guard over our campus for half a century or more.

I like them. They're nifty.

Sometimes I just wonder who designed them, where they came from, why they are here. And how long will they stay?

Sharon Moore is a junior journalism major and serves as senior news editor for The Tech Talk. E-mail comments to peculiargirl@yahoo.com.